GEORGE HARRISON

The Art of Dying

By Steve Ludwig

There'll come a time when all of us must leave here

Then nothing Sister Mary can do

Will keep me here with you

As nothing in this life that I've been trying

Can equal or surpass the art of dying

                                           --George Harrison, 1970

In the Sixties, it was rare to watch a Beatles press conference or interview without seeing at least one of the Fab Four smoking a cigarette. It was usually John or Paul or Ringo on different occasions, but it always seemed to be George as the one Beatle with a constant ciggie in his hand.

In July 1997, George noticed a lump on the side of his neck. It was removed, and it proved to be malignant. George blamed it on all of his tobacco intake over the years.

In June 1998, he told his fans, "I'm not going to die on you folks yet. I'm not a lump person."

In the next two-and-a-half years, George seemed to be prophetic. His cancer was in remission, and from all indications, he had beaten it.

On December 23, 1999, a young woman broke into George's home in Maui. The Harrisons, George and his wife Olivia, weren't home. It came out during the trial that the woman had been stalking George for years.

They weren't in Maui because they were at George's other residence in England, in his mansion at Friar Park.

A week after the young woman's break-in at Maui, at 3:30 in the morning, George was awoken at Friar Park by the sound of breaking glass. He went downstairs to investigate, wearing only his pajama bottoms. There he was confronted by a mentally disturbed man, who proceeded to stab him in the chest forty times. 
As George described the gruesome confrontation, "I thought I was dying. I vividly remember a deliberate thrust of a knife and I could feel the blood entering my mouth and hear my breath exhaling from the wound."
He was saved only because Olivia used a heavy lamp on the assailant's head, knocking him unconscious.
It was later determined that had George been lying in bed when he was attacked, he certainly wouldn't have survived as he wouldn't have been able to fight back.

Surgeons were forced to remove part of George's lung. 

The two break-ins were unrelated; the scary side of fame.
After John Lennon's shocking assassination on Dec. 8, 1980, the three remaining members of the most popular band in music history took extra precautions for their safety. As I mentioned in a previous blog, Paul McCartney, to this day, needs bomb-sniffing dogs to inspect his dressing room before each concert.
And in spite of the extraordinary security on all of the properties owned by George (certainly the most private of the Beatles), somehow it still wasn't enough.
Yet through it all, George never lost his famous, dry sense of humor. When asked by reporters if he knew anything about the man who almost stabbed him to death, George replied, "Well, I know he wasn't trying out for the Traveling Wilburys."

But close friends said the psychological scars left by the incident were deeper in George than the physical ones.

However, physically he was not in much better shape. He was understandably weakened by the attack. He would tire out quickly, and, at times, had trouble drawing a full breath.
The ever-humble George apologized to his fans for any concern they may have felt for him.

Then in March 2001, a malignant tumor was removed from one of George's already fragile lungs.

One of George's closest aides was sure the attack in 1999 was why the cancer returned.
"After the attack, he didn't have the strength left to fight."

Ringo recalled visiting George on one occasion while George was receiving his chemo treatment. Ringo told George that he had to leave him and go to Boston, because Ringo's own daughter, Lee, was receiving treatment for a brain tumor (she since recovered). Lying on his back, unable to move, George asked Ringo, "Do you want me to go with you?"

A month later, George was receiving treatment at the Oncology Institute of Southern Switzerland. In between treatments, he resided at a home by a lake at the Italian border. 
Paul met him in Milan to spend some of the quickly lessening time with the friend he had known since high school.

George had never been afraid of dying; in fact, he said, he had prepared his entire adult life for his inevitable demise. 
With this second cancerous tumor, George knew time was of the essence. He needed to finish working on songs that would eventually wind up being his final album (titled Brainwashed).
Never one to shy away from sharing his inner thoughts, George, now knowing he was going to die soon, composed a song about it:

Never been so crazy

But I've never felt so sure

I wish I had the answer to give

Don't even have the cure

Talking to myself

Crying out loud

Only I can hear me

I'm stuck inside a cloud

I made some exhibition

I lost my will to eat

The only thing that matters to me

Is to touch your lotus feet

                                                          --"Stuck Inside A Cloud"

Looking to get his affairs in order, George needed to tie up some loose ends. 

In early October, less than two months before he died, George kept a promise he had made to fellow musician Jools Holland (formerly of Squeeze). 

George gathered all his strength and entered a recording studio to record a song he had written for Jools's upcoming album. It was called "Horse To the Water," and it was the last song George ever recorded. 

Its lyrics referred to three old friends. One verse alluded to "...a friend of mine in so much misery." Paul had recently lost his wife, Linda, to cancer, and he was still grieving. Another spoke of an alcoholic (Ringo is a recovering alcoholic); yet another verse referred to a preacher (John was known for his many anthemic songs). 

Overall, "Horse To the Water''s theme is one of heroes not being able to find peace.

Once again, displaying his dark wit, George copyrighted the song to a new publishing company of his own creation, "RIP Ltd. 2001."

Within a few short weeks, his cancer had spread from his lungs to his brain.

Skeletal and hallucinating from an enormous ingestion of painkillers, George decided to receive experimental treatment at Staten Island University Hospital.

It was there he was visited for the last time by Paul. They spent their final hours together holding hands, laughing, and joking as if nothing were wrong.

George wanted to spend his final days in his beloved home in Hawaii.

While flying across the United States, George became too weak, and the plane had to make an emergency landing in Los Angeles.

For privacy, the Harrison family purposely "leaked" a phony address to the press about where George was brought.

He, was, in fact, actually brought to a secret residence owned by Paul.

It was here, at 1:30 PM on November 29, 2001, surrounded by family members and a few friends, George lost his long fight with cancer.

He was cremated at the same place Cass Elliot had been cremated many years earlier.
Olivia and son, Dhani announced that George's ashes were to be scattered in the Ganges River in India. However, this may have very well been George's final joke. It is believed that he asked his family to say that in order to shield them from the paparrazzi and gawkers. Apparentally, his ashes were actually scattered on the grounds of the beautiful home he'd bought in Switzerland, near to where he had received radiotherapy. 

 Dhani summed up the last few years of his dad's life:

 "He never sat and felt sorry for himself. He had no fears or worries left when he died..."

In my next blog, I write about the many things that were said by so many people after George's death; Ringo writes a song about his fallen friend; and Paul immortalizes George in concert.


Perhaps you'd enjoy listening to my radio show, STEVE LUDWIG'S CLASSIC POP CULTURE. It's at www.PlanetLudwig.com. Thanks!

Follow me on Twitter:   www.Twitter.com/LudGuy

If you liked my blog, you may also like my first book. It's called SEE YOU IN CCU: A LIGHTHEARTED TALE OF MY OPEN-HEART SURGERY.

It's available for half-price at my website:  CCUBOOK.COM.

My brother Tom's latest blog is also up. You'll find it at SecondGradeMinds.wordpress.com.

AS ALWAYS, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING MY BLOGS.~ Steve

        

SOME STARS ARE JUST FULL OF THEMSELVES

(Yet Some Aren't)

Backstage Contract Demands

By Steve Ludwig

Are you as fascinated as I am at some of the things that appear as part of a performer's contract rider? 

A contract rider is a list of requests or demands by the performer for a concert promoter to follow.

Reading these riders gives one a good idea as to the personality of the performer; they're certainly not an end-all glimpse into a performer, but they can be quite telling.

Jennifer Lopez has more talent in her pinky (or in her case, her left buttock) than I do in my entire body. 

But once I checked out her contract rider, she proved to be the type of person I had heard she was for so long: one of the biggest, most self-absorbed divas in the world. 

The phony baloney appeared for a charity concert a few years ago; a charity concert, ok? Before she would perform, her rider included that she must be provided with a forty-foot private trailer adorned with white curtains, white carpeting, and white furniture. Add to that expensive French candles at fifty bucks a pop; I wonder how much those demands set back the charity. And when she agreed to be part of a recording for the same charity, yup, she insisted on the forty-foot, custom-furnished trailer. Grrrr...

Mariah Carey's just as full of herself. Her backstage area has to include furniture with "no busy patterns," two dozen white roses, and $200 bottles of cabernet sauvignon.

Christina Aguilera demands a full police escort to and from her concert venues, so she doesn't have to endure traffic jams (like us common folk).

Sure, the argument can be made that, hey, these people have earned the right to demand these things. I say BUNK! They've earned the right to be idiots and to look down at people? Or maybe they were this way before they "earned" this "right."

Compare Carey and Lopez's riders to Alicia Keys's. Ms. Keys puts both of those divas to shame, talent-wise, as well as rider-wise. What does this performer who has sold over 15 million records demand? Only tuna fish sandwiches and some simple Glade candles. Why do I get the feeling that Alicia Keys would be a cooler friend to have?

Lisa Marie Presley, daughter of Elvis the King, could be demanding. Being Elvis's only kid automatically brings with it a sense of unreality. Keeping Princess Presley happy must be near impossible, wouldn't you think? She must "require" thousands of flowers at least, before she can give a representative performance. Nope. Lisa Marie's rider states, "Flowers are OK, but not necessary."   

I developed an interest in these things a few years ago after I had read that one of the stipulations in Van Halen's contracts was that, among other things, their backstage dressing rooms must be supplied with M & M's; however, all the brown M & M's had to be removed, or else the band may not play that night. 

I thought to myself, What a bunch of friggin' prima donnas. But after I discovered the full story, I found myself giving credit to Van Halen for being pretty darn smart. One of the first things their handlers and roadies check when they arrive at a gig is the M & M dish. If there are brown M & M's in there, they know the promoter has not properly read the contract, and there may be more important issues to address before the band takes the stage. Pretty clever, huh?

The Beach Boys have a similar instance in their riders. They want BIC lighters available backstage, but none of them may be green.

Some of the biggest, most influential performers (not necessarily the biggest-selling...are you listening, Jennifer, Mariah, and Christina?) are the coolest.

Bob Dylan: a dozen clean towels, 2 ashtrays, a bar of soap, and a table for a food spread.

The velvet-voiced Smokey Robinson? His rider stipulates that whatever he is entitled to backstage, so are his band members and backup singers.

Bruce Springsteen projects an image as being a man of the people. Is he the same way backstage? You bet! The Boss insists on an area large enough so the band and crew can share their pre-concert meal together.

Some riders might surprise you, as they did me.

Rapper Eminem insists on no alcohol backstage (he's a recovering alcoholic). He asks for "Dannon Light and Fit Yogurt" as well as Gundelshein pickles to be available.

Marilyn Manson wants Gummi bears, Doritos, and 2% milk in his dressing room.

Obviously in response to a bad experience, the Black-Eyed Peas stipulate that the sound board engineer must have a command of the English language, and he must be sober throughout the performance!

One part of Donny Osmond's rider doesn't surprise me. He seems like a good guy. So it makes sense that if a fan runs up onstage, she/he is to be removed quickly but kindly.

Ditto for Elton John. He threatens that any of the venue crew will be relieved of his or her duty if any concertgoer is dealt with in an excessively hostile manner. 

Even if you're familiar with Iggy Pop's persona, it'd be hard not to laugh at two of his demands: There must be a Bob Hope impersonator backstage, as well as "...seven dwarfs dressed up as those dwarfs from that marvelous Walt Disney film about the woman who goes to sleep for a hundred years after biting a poisoned dwarf, or maybe pricking her finger on a sharp apple...or something." After listing tons of these superbly outrageous demands, Pop's contract states, "If you can't do these things, it's OK."

Did you know that Willie Nelson's concert venues must be smoke-free? (Yeah, I raised my eyebrows at that one, too.)

I got a laugh out of Crosby, Stills, and Nash. Before the concert, they ask that among other things, 12 bottles of beer be out on the food table. After the show? Five cases of beer!

I saved the two most sobering riders for the end, and they both have to do with the Beatles. 

No doubt as a result of John Lennon's murder in 1980, as well as George Harrison being nearly stabbed to death by an intruder in 1999 (two years before his death from cancer), Paul McCartney's dressing room must be checked by bomb-sniffing dogs before he enters it.

And we go back to the Sixties for the greatest request of all from the most influential band of all time. 

The Beatles, while touring the US in the midst of our country's civil rights protests, had it written into their contract that they would not be required to play to a segregated audience.

Just one more reason why they're the best of all.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * 

And well, hey there~ You might enjoy my radio show. It's STEVE LUDWIG'S CLASSIC POP CULTURE, and you can listen at www.PlanetLudwig.com. Thanks!

Follow me on Twitter: www.Twitter.com/LudGuy.

IF YOU ENJOYED READING MY BLOG, WOULD YOU CONSIDER BUYING MY BOOK, SEE YOU IN CCU? IT'S AVAILABLE FOR HALF-PRICE AT MY WEBSITE,  CCUBOOK.COM.

AND MY BROTHER TOM'S BLOG IS AT  SecondGradeMinds.wordpress.com.

AS ALWAYS, THANKS SO MUCH FOR READING MY BLOGS...Steve 

  

I'M NOT A REAL AUTHOR,

BUT I PLAY ONE ON THE INTERNET

(Part 2 of 2)

By Steve Ludwig

So the day my finished, published book arrived in the mail was neat-o, baby. I didn't know this, but before the hard-copy books are released for sale, traditionally the author gets his or her copy first. 

Well, mine arrived (a hardcover and a paperback) and I held it in my hands and kinda just looked at it. Sue wasn't home from work yet, so I had a few hours alone with my little book. I kept picking it up, then cleaning off the glossy cover where my fingerprints lay.

I had gone back and forth with the publisher's art department, because I had wanted the word lighthearted in the title on the cover to be lower-cased, with the other important words in the title capitalized. No biggie to anyone except me, right? I just felt if See You in CCU: A Lighthearted Tale of My Open-Heart Surgery was going to be a mostly lighthearted affair, let's uncapitalize the word lighthearted.

A couple weeks later, when I received bookmarks and business cards as part of my publicity package, the word lighthearted was capitalized.

But being I was the only one in the universe who cared or even would have noticed, I didn't obsess over it (too much...).

I went into some local bookstores with a bunch of books in my bag, to ask the store managers if they would stock my book on a 50/50 deal: They'd get half and I'd get half of the money they make on my book. 

Most of the managers were nice about it; I was honest and told them I was a first-time author, I really didn't know how the whole sales thing worked, and I'd appreciate it if they would give me a break. 

Most took five books; one store manager, who wasn't interested because he was such a wonderful addition to the human race and too good for me, joyfully asked me really smarmy-like as I walked out of his store with my books, "And what are ya gonna do when ya run out of family members to buy your book?"

I was kinda taken aback, maybe a little hurt, but I just laughed and kept walking. Only when I got back in my car did I start thinking of what I should have said to him (most of which is better left unprinted).

But Mr. Big Shot Store Manager was the exception; even some of the big outlets, like a few Barnes and Nobles, have stocked my book.

Something I learned about being a first-time, unknown author is that book stores like Barnes and Noble usually don't automatically stock new books. 

I had to pay a fee to my publisher to become part of the "returnabilty program," which means if a bookstore doesn't sell your book after a period of time, they can return it to the distributor and get their money back. This way they're more likely to stock your book, knowing they are at no-risk if it doesn't sell. 

However, being part of the returnabilty program still doesn't guarantee that a place like Barnes and Noble will sell it. I went on the internet and found the addresses of Barnes and Noble stores in all 50 states and sent a letter to the store managers asking them to stock my book. I sent out 110 letters, as most states have multiple outlets. I didn't send to every single outlet, and naturally I still worry about the stores that didn't get letters.

I keep thinking one of those stores will have a customer looking for a book about open-heart surgery, and my book won't be among their choices!

Now, how do I know if a store sells my book, and how do I get my money for it? The local, single-outlet stores are easy to keep track of. I just give a call and see if there's any money for me to come pick up.

But outlets like Barnes and Noble pay the publisher, and from my publisher I receive a royalty check every four months (they receive payment from Barnes and Noble).

If a person buys a book from Barnes and Noble (either at one of their physically-standing stores or online), the author (ME!) gets only 10 % of the book price. The same goes for Amazon.com or other online services.

If the book is bought from my publisher's website (xlibris.com), I get 25 % of the book price.

I make most of the money from book sales by selling them myself at book readings and at my own website:  ccubook.com.

How do I get the books to sell by myself? Gotta buy them from the publisher, albeit at a reduced author's rate. The more books I buy in bulk from the publisher, the cheaper the cost to me.

In other words, I shan't quit my day job! However, as I've mentioned before, I never wrote a book to make money; it's just for the love of writing. 

Here's an incident that still brings a smile to my face. A little while ago, I stopped into a local Barnes and Noble. I hoped they stocked my book, so I looked around for it; couldn't find it. So I went to customer service and asked, very self-consciously, "Do you have a book called See You In CCU?" I even said the title as if I wasn't sure if that was the right title. 

"Who's the author?" I was asked. 

"I think it's Ludwig. Steve." (Ay-yi-yi...I'M the author!!! Don't give it away, ya dope!)

The clerk checked her monitor..."Yeah here it is. I'll show you."

She walked me over to the shelf, and there I was, snuggled comfortably between Susan Lucci and Jane Lynch:

Ha, ha, I thought. If Susan and Jane (first-name basis, of course) were both in this store at the exact same time I was, and they were looking for their books and they saw me and my book between them, they would HAVE to shake my hand after I introduced myself! (Well, it makes sense to me!)

So the clerk took one of my books off the shelf and said, "Come on. I'll ring you up."

Uh-oh. My author's picture is on the back cover. Don't look at the back cover, Ms. Nice Clerk Lady. The jig'll be up!!

"Uh, that's OK. I'll take it. I'm still gonna look around." Quick thinking, close friend of Susan Lucci and Jane Lynch!

I walked around the store like an idiot for a minute or so, holding my book which I had no intention of buying. Once the coast was clear, I casually returned it to its shelf.

(Incidentally, I went back to the same Barnes and Noble a couple weeks later and there was only one copy out of the four of my book left. Yeah! Sold three copies in two weeks! It's nice to have family and good friends!)

Speaking of family, I need to take thank, first, my nephew Billy Ludwig, a professional photographer, for taking the author's picture of Sue and me which appears on the back cover of my book:

Billy will also be taking the photo for the cover of my upcoming book, FEELING WELL: SURVIVING LIFE AND STUPID PUNS, to be published sometime in 2013.

And secondly, I want to thank my brother, Tom Ludwig, a graduate of the Art Students League in New York, for doing the 8 fantastic, humorous illustrations that appear in SEE YOU IN CCU.

Tom will also be doing illustrations for my FEELING WELL book. Tom doesn't know that  yet, so...Tom, if you're reading this blog, guess what...

To support SEE YOU IN CCU, I've appeared on cable TV shows and radio shows, did a promo video, as well as doing book readings, two of which were at Gizzi's in Greenwich Village, NYC. 

Evan Ginzburg, the booking agent at Gizzi's, has also had me on his radio show, LegendsRadio.net. 

In past blogs, I've written extensively about these radio, TV, and personal appearances.

Check out my blogs from May 1, 2012; May 21, 2012; June 2, 2012; and August 27, 2012 to read about those appearances.

Follow me on Twitter:  www.Twitter.com/LudGuy.

I have a pop culture radio show called STEVE LUDWIG'S CLASSIC POP CULTURE, at www.PlanetLudwig.com.

Thanks to the over 10,000 of you who have read my blogs!

IF YOU ENJOYED READING THIS BLOG, WHY, HECK, YOU MAY LIKE MY BOOK, SEE YOU IN CCU. IT'S AVAILABLE FOR HALF-PRICE IF YOU ORDER IT DIRECTLY FROM MY WEBSITE:  CCUBOOK.COM.

Check out my brother Tom's blog at SecondGradeMinds.wordpress.com.

As always, thanks so much for taking the time to read my blog.  -Steve